Tuesday, October 28, 2008

soooo, i got new hair.

hair-over-the-eye hair. very veronica lake. i figured i should take pics while it's salon-fresh, because there's no way i can re-create this. p.s. the day i woke up, ...and was no longer in love with my ex-boyfriend was the greatest, sunniest, brightest, most satisfying day...almost ever. you didn't know me back then...that dumping pre-dates my blog. i was a mess. if i had blogged, it would have been un-readable. unbearable. an overflowing barrage of rain, and sadness and gloom....a diary of mope-ery. but on the day my best friend asked, "do you still miss him?" and i said "no," without a doubt and without explanation...ahhhhhhhh. i cannot express. i even questioned whether i had ever really been in love with him. thought, maybe i just enjoyed the chase, or the sex. Oh, but then i got sad. To think, "maybe I never loved" him would have meant I had never loved. That possibly I did not have the expanse to love....or that I do not know what it means to love. Oh well...there's still time, right?

5 comments:

Jazzbrew said...

There is plenty of time AND you now have something to look forward to. Hopefully it will be one of those sneak up on you experiences where you realize you're in love and don't know how you got there. It will be as natural, refreshing and easy as breathing.

Your hair looks fantastic and your nose is still incredibly cute. How could you not love that nose?

£ said...

chubbs i LOVE it! its way flattering. you are making me want to cut my hair! wow. ab fab. same place you went to last time? do I have to come to NY and solicit your stylist?!

the whole post relationship "was it love wasn't it love" quandary is something I know all too well. its like - if it wasn't love, then what was the point? because not only is the relationship over, but now it seems there wasn't even any deep feeling in the first place. I usually don't broach the question until I'm far enough removed from the breakup so that I can answer it objectively as i can. so far the answers have all been in the affirmative, and while that doesn't cancel out the pain of a failed relay @ least i know it wasn't all for naught. and that's kind of a solace. i guess. ugh.

( sorry if I totally missed/derailed your train of thought.)

asabi said...

LOVE the hair! :)

etoilee8 said...

You look lovely. Seriously. Sorry I was running around like a madwoman in New York last week. Next time, you and me darling, you and me!

Chubbs said...

thanks jazz....i guess there's still hope, for my nose :-)

Lex--u didn't derail my thoughts...u always give incredible insight. And yes, same salon, different stylist. If you wanna give them a try, I'll send you the info...but you have to agree to have coffee with me.

Asabi wabi..thanks hun.

And speaking of coffee, my sweet Etoilee when are you coming back? And what happened to our fab pics?